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A woman lies face down on the floor of a home kitchen. A man steps over her to make himself a grilled cheese sandwich. Then he sits at a kitchen table. He eats half the sandwich then walks over to hold the other half in front of her face. She doesn’t respond. There is a small crash offstage. We hear a small dog barking and the sound of paper tearing.

MAN

(exiting the room)

GYRO!

(The man re-enters holding a stack of mail, some of which is shredded at the edges. He flips through the first few pieces then tosses it on the table without opening any. There is a knock at the door. The man takes a bite of the second half of the grilled cheese then exits the room again. We hear him offstage speaking to the guest.)

VOICE

Afternoon, Mr. Clark. Don’t know if you saw, I gave you the Harrisons’ mail on mistake.

MAN
(offstage)

Hey Victor. No worries (entering with a fresh stack of mail in his hand, yelling over his shoulder), let me just grab it—(he exchanges the Clark’s mail for the Harrison’s mail and exits, but snatches another bite of the sandwich first)

MAN

—Gyro took a bite outta their electric bill.

VOICE

Would he take a bite out of mine? Have a good one.

MAN

Take care, Victor.

(Sound of the door closing. The man re-enters and sits at the table. He begins leafing through the mail. As he does…)

MAN

Just can’t obey. (Beat.) Why should I think it’ll ever stop? (Beat.) You been that way since—

WOMAN

Don’t be mean to gyro.

MAN

He got at the Harrison’s mail, you hear that?

(She doesn’t respond.)

MAN

(unclear whether to her or to himself—we get the sense he speaks to himself often) Gas. What are you, what are you. (He opens it.) 66.71. Cable. America’s Thieves and Thugs. (Beat, then to her) That’s AT&T. Credit card application. Invitation to your niece’s wedding.

WOMAN

Yours too.

MAN

Ours.

WOMAN

That all?

MAN

Yes ma’am. Alright, time to get up.

WOMAN

It’s not 2:00 yet.

MAN

You’re right. It’s 2:37. Victor came late today.

(He walks over to her. She groans. He reaches to pull her up.)

MAN

Let’s go.